For Hazell

HIV and AIDS has been with us now for 25 years.

Today is World AIDS Day and across the world it is being marked by friends, lovers and families. So many beautiful people have been taken from us by this cruel, relentless virus; and today we remember them more than ever.

I lost Dougie Cowen (aka Hazell) - a man I have so much to thank for - in 1995. I met Hazell by accident on a bulletin board, long before Gaydar or Eurowoof. The second I met him outside the Odeon in Edinburgh I knew my life was going to change. Loud, camp and dressed head to toe in a form fitting three piece suit, Hazell brought me kicking and screaming out of my closeted life. Within three months I'd moved to Edinburgh to share a flat with him. That was in 1992 - the year I discovered just how fantastic my sexuality could be. It was all thanks to him. He was a rogue though. He flirted with danger in so many areas of his life, but he always protected me from it. When Hazell told me he was HIV positive, I wanted to find out as much as I could about it. I became a volunteer at Milestone House, an Aids Hospice in Edinburgh. It set me on the career path I am on now. I wanted to help all these gay men who were being killed by this horrible disease. In 1997 I became a volunteer for Gay Men's Health and realised (finally) what I wanted to do with my life. In 1999 I moved to Manchester to work full time for Healthy Gay Manchester - now The Lesbian & Gay Foundation. It was the best thing I ever did in my life. I have never looked back.

Today I have never been happier in my professional and private life. It's all thanks to Hazell. If I hadn't met him that day in 1992, I might still be a quiet, closeted gay man living in a small town. Today I am a confident, proud gay man living in one of the best (and gay friendly) city's in the country.

Hazell - thank you. I still miss you.